Patience and Prayer

This week was the first week of school, and the children illustrated a mix of feelings before Monday approached.  Some were excited, some were nervous, but others would dread it because it meant they had to keep learning how to read, improve their math skills, or start writing those long essays on information that seems useless for the future. I however, remembered that this time of year was always one of anxiousness, because I could not wait to get back to school. I was eager to learn, and with that thought process in hand, I have decided to make that a goal for this year, meaning, I want the kids I work with the be excited about academia.
What does this all mean? It means having patience and praying for the children as individuals and not just a collective group. I have never been an extremely patient person, but this ministry has redefined that for me. This past Friday, I was assigned to work with one Kindergarten girl and a first grade boy during the tutoring hour immediately after the children arrive. The kindergarten girl was more reserved and I had talked with her outside of tutoring many times before. The first grade boy was slightly different, as he was the one child in my first grade group that caused "issues" to say the least. When he threw tantrums, it would including kicking the tables in the classroom or throwing toys, but when he calms down and focuses on his work, he could be called the most brilliant child in my classroom. This intelligence is something that I will not lose sight of, despite my frustrations with him and when I noticed this behavior earlier in the week, all I could think to do was pray. I prayed for him, I prayed for guidance working with him, and I prayed for the ability to understand and love him through being patient and optimistic. This session with him and the kindergarten girl was the first breakthrough of patience.
We sat around a table that was relatively high, and it had four benches around it. The kindergarten girl was on one bench, and the first grade boy and I were on the one perpendicular to her. Throughout the lesson, I did something slightly different and completely uncharacteristic for me as an instructor; I let the first grade boy go under the table and sit on different benches, and I let him walk around the room. This whole time, he answered all of my questions, was sounding out all of his sight words, and was continually moving through the whole process. I had patience and recognized his unique learning style in the process.
At the end of the day, before this first grade boy went home, he came up to me and tugged on my shirt. I looked directly into the big, dark eyes that were gazing at me and said "What's up, honey?" And he said "Thank you for being nice to me."
Prayer and Patience.

God is patient with us all the time. We have a plan mapped out for us, but we make wrong decisions and stray from that path. When we recognize that the ability to get back on that path through willingness to be patient and being completely responsive to prayer is necessary, then we ultimately recognize that this is one of the many times we best understand God's grace and His love for us. As I continue going about this ministry and serving because God has placed me here, love is going to be redefined. He has and will always love me, and that kind of intentional emotion needs to be more prevalent on this earth. As a missionary, it is important for me to not only love what I do, but to show love to each person I cross paths with, because the love that God intends for us to show is the only kind of love we need.

What Eyes Do We Use?

Since being in the Miami area, I have experienced some interesting culture shock, with everything from general housing appearances to the diversity among schools. However, the looks I have received while walking through Walmart, driving down the street, or standing on line at the grocery store have been the most unusual in relation to any other cultural experience I have had thus far. My question to them is what eyes are you using to see me?

These week, I have learned that the way you look at others should be the way that Jesus looks at them. The parable of the blind man in the book of John is one that illustrates this idea. Jesus healed the man who had been blind since birth by spitting in the mud and rubbing that mud onto his eyes. This kind of miracle makes me wonder, if I rub my eyes from how blind I have been to the beauty of each person I have encountered in life, how many more people would I have truly seen? Jesus sees us all and loves us all because he knows we are all blessings on this earth. As the school year started today, I was encouraged to remember that each child who walked into the building was beautiful in their own way and embracing that was my job. They all have different talents, family backgrounds, and interests, but they are all children of God, and that is more important than anything.

The Many Hats We Wear

Every Friday night, there is a theme to our middle school/high school worship night. Last night, everyone was told to wear a hat for a fun hat night. We played lots of games like capture the hat, a scaventure, and myself and one other new member had to wear plain white hats while all of the kids got markers and had to sign their names on as fast as they could in a serious competition; I won of course :)

The worship theme however, was discussing the many hats we wear, as well as the hat we should always wear, and that is the "child of God" hat. The kids discussed what it meant to wear a student hat, son/daughter hat, boyfriend/girlfriend hat, employee//volunteer hat, etc. The part that many of them did not realize was that the "child of God" hat never comes off. As believers in Christ and followers of the word, it is our job to illustrate that in all aspects of our lives. For example, in school you do not cut class or talk back to a teacher, as a child of God would not do those things. In your house, you should not curse at parents or slap around your siblings, but show them love at all times and talk about your frustrations in a calm verbal way. This discussion carried over to stations, where each of the employees had a category and a small activity for the children to complete. I had the boyfriend/girlfriend station and my mind was blown away. I explained the importance of 1 Corinthians 13:4-13, which is an entire section on love. I explained that you do not need to be in a relationship currently to know what love is because God shows it to you every day. At my station, there were heart shaped cut-outs and I told the kids that on  one side they should write the ways that God has shown His love to them, and on the other side, they should write down how they want to show that same kind of love in their relationships in the future. This could mean writing down your relationship values, ways to keep Christ as the center of that relationship or what you hope to find in the person you date. The kids wrote down everything from I will hug my boyfriend/girlfriend everyday to I can and will save myself for marriage. Every child participated.

At the end, we circled up for a final song and prayer. My boss asked if anyone was feeling led to pray and show they want to lead others. There was one child (who I will call "Kay") that responded saying he would. Kay is still in middle school and that young inspiration made me so excited. While we were cleaning up, I went over to him and told him that he did a great job with prayer that evening. His response left me speechless. 

Kay said, "Mary, isn't it sad that no one would pray when its to someone who died for us?"

What could you say to that? The only thing I could say to Kay was that I encouraged him to share that message with the other children, because they needed to hear it! Kay recognized the love God has for us and later discussed with me that he wants to work on wearing that "Child of God" hat all the time. Have you recognized that Christ died for us and we should pray to Him, thanking Him for that incredible love and sacrifice? How can you make your journey through life more Christ-like? Think of the hats you wear, and think of the changes you could make that would make your growth continue in more positive ways :)

This journey has been one week long, yet it has been one of the most amazing weeks I have ever experienced. 

Settled Outside Normal Comfort Zones

So I arrived in the Miami area on Friday afternoon with my incredible brother, Joe. His presence for the first few days was more than essential to my transition here, and he hopefully knows I appreciated it more than anything.
To focus on the current events, have you ever been somewhere that made you feel like the center of attention, just because you looked differently, dressed differently, or even appeared more uncomfortable than those around you? Yea....welcome to Miami. I was ready for this mentally and have been put into that set of emotions since I got off the Florida turnpike and drove on the streets of the city. For those of you in Rockland County and for those of you reading this on a couch or bed with the TV on and a nice laptop on your legs, I encourage you to think about how unbelievably privileged you are and do something to give back. We have come from an ideal suburban life that has provided a security bubble from many major real world issues that were mostly only discussed primarily in textbooks and classroom settings. I am in a city where many kids do not graduate from high school and never step foot on a college campus. Think of the stability you have had and think of the comforts you have been able to maintain because of that continuous support system of family and friends and that amazing life that you have complained about numerous times. I have been guilty of all of this, and I am not here to say I am perfect. However, this exposure to a lifestyle unlike ours and one that can test what my true necessities are is something I wish everyone could experience to some degree and learn to handle.
  I am a minority and have never been tested in my ability to live with that idea before now. I was told by many that this would be the case, and I discussed it in all of my interviews, but I am currently facing that foreseen reality.
Among these uncomfortable initial feelings, all I can still anticipate is having a year full of change, exposure, and God working in ways I would never expect. I may be getting looks now, but I can only hope as I learn to love this community and grow into it, I will become a part of the roots that this area is based through.
Unfortunately, most do not know that God will provide and protect in situations like this. He will never let go of you, no matter the hardships you face. My job down here is to provide help, inspire hope, and illustrate faith, and this is best done by coming to a level of understanding with love and compassion. I am not here to judge, but to be embedded. I am not here to push, but to emphasize and encourage. I am here for God and I will be His servant in whatever way He intends for me.