Lots To Do

Sharing my experiences in Miami has been a strong desire, but my ministry agenda has taken me away from the ability to blog. However, it should have been a top priority, because sharing the kingdom of God in whatever way I can should always be on the forefront.

Ministry amazes me. I go into Branches everyday, knowing that I can never prepare fully for what God has in store for me there. How many other places in our life do we feel that way though? As human beings, we continually compete with the clock and with others, in thinking the faster we get things done and the more things we get done, the greater our accomplishments are. I have come to think differently. 

Completing the work God provides for us should fully consume the fibers of our being, and should be delegated by the amount of energy He provides for us each day. Yes, there are earthly deadlines to attend to, but God will not permit those deadlines to exist unless He knew that we could handle it. From my point of view, if deadlines are not met, or work is not completed accurately, it is because we did not let God into it from the start. God wants to be involved in all we do and by dismissing or not acknowledging His presence in all of our words and actions, we can lose sight of the truth within our deeds.
This weekend, I will be in silence for 24 hours with the other DOOR dwellers, on an intentional silent retreat. During that time of silence, we are encouraged to be focused on the words that God has set in our heart, and spend time getting to know why they are there. Take a few minutes this weekend and shut off your phone, close down facebook, and sit quietly, knowing that God is with you, even during those moments of silent action.

A Job or Work?

Most people wake up each morning with schoolwork ahead of them, a 9-5 job with a fixed hourly wage or salary, or are unemployed, about to spend hours searching for that perfect job. My question is, is it all for the right reasons?
In my phone conversation with a lovely friend this morning, she referenced "good work," "a good kind of busy" and "work that was worthwhile" as a description for what I was doing in Florida City currently. I do not think she could have been more correct.
When I first arrived here, I had a job. Now, after 2 and 1/2 months of being here, I have work to accomplish.
When we set out to do the work God has given us to do, it is the work of a servant to Him. God has no set hours to be confined to, but will provide us with the energy we need for that day to get His work done.
I am a big person when it comes to lists, planners, and planning for the future. Recently, with the scheduling I have had, God has shown me what it means to be humbled in doing His work. While I continue to make lessons for phonics, figure out recreational games for the Kindergarten through second grade, and strive to make the high school group a great environment, God has made it clear that I am not supposed to see further than what the light He shines makes visible. His work is timed perfectly, distributed evenly, and encouraged by faith.
So, when your work has its moments of frustration or can seem like it is too much to handle, refocus, and consider asking God for strength and assurance that you can complete what He has given you to do.

The Good Choice Desk

So, patience has been a continued location of growth for me since school began in the end of August. My honest self-evaluation at this point is that I have grown to be more patient, but still have a great amount of work to do in that department.
One first grade boy has been the true test of that patience, in a way that has permitted me to get to know him on a level I did not know could exist. He has shown anger, frustration and sadness towards me many times these past two months, but has yet to go one day without running into me to provide an excessively large hug to start the afternoon. How does a boy of such struggle and internal pain show love so easily?
I wanted to be patient with him, so I had to come up with a way for him to express his anger effectively, without hurting himself or others in the process. With this in mind, I created the "Good Choice" desk, based on the art therapy principles that someone who has pent up emotions should release them in an artistic way. This desk was officially put into effect last week and has changed the life of this child. Typically, playground time ended with sand being thrown or kicked because he did not get the same amount of time on a swing as someone else, and classroom time would sometimes become disrupted with this boy kicking under the table because his blocks fell or he did not like the snack that day and wanted something else. This boy had plenty of great moments in my classroom, as he worked hard on homework and did his best to participate when he could, but these strong, negative emotions seem to give him a bit of an image most of the time. This "Good Choice" desk has changed him.
Instead of throwing sand, he goes back into the classroom and rolls play doh on the desk. Instead of kicking a desk, he puts headphones on for 10 minutes to relax. Instead of throwing toys, he colors pictures of how he feels and shares them with me. This child is making his positive emotions finally outweigh his negative ones.
If I did not have patience with him and faith that this would work, I do not know where I would be. Patient is definitely a virtue and I have a great respect for all those working with children.
So my challenge for those who read this is, instead of assuming the worst of those around us when they appear to be a certain way, ask them why they appear that way instead.

Church Shopping

How do you define your worship style? It was not until I started exploring the churches in Miami that this concept really hit hard.
Since being in Miami, I have been to Branches United Methodist Church, Christ Fellowship Church, Miami Vineyard, United Methodist Church of Coral Gables, and Calvary Chapel. Not one church was the same, which is to be expected, but all of them brought out a different style that made me question how God was speaking to me in a church setting.
When I walked into a church building years ago, my positive or negative impressions would come from the aesthetically pleasing environment, the friendliness of the individuals there, and if coffee was served, it was an added bonus. Wrong motives for finding comfort right? Well now, my main focus above all is the message provided. How is the pastor preaching the word? How is he inviting me into the service? But most of all, how is God speaking through the pastor and the congregation in the service?
This is where style has come in. Each church had a pastor that yelled, or cried, or made jokes, or gave life story examples, but all of them were lacking something for me. No matter how much I was feeling the Lord's presence during worship music while amazing bands were playing or how welcoming the congregation was to newcomers, the message was not there. This is not to say nothing sunk in or there was no depth to the messages, but I was not understanding how the Lord was communicating during that time.
So my question is, do we worship expecting a message that speaks to us, or do we worship with willingness to receive a message that may not be to our "expectations" but could possibly provide a challenge? Coming from the perspective of only worshiping with the narrow-minded viewpoint of everything relying on the work of the message, I plan on revisiting these churches, and allowing myself to receive them with open eyes, open ears, and an open heart.
So, the next time you are at church, be open to the message, and try your best to not be overcritical like I have chosen to be very recently.

Short-handed Ministry

Have you ever worked in a setting and all you could think was, what would I do without my co-workers because I could never get this done on my own? Well, this week was a true test of that. Illness has been spreading like wildfire through my building, and somehow, I have been lucky enough to stay healthy through it all. However, that meant when one of my co-workers was in the hospital, and there were only 2 of us working with the high school kids instead of 3, I had to pick up my game.
This was also a big week for others that I work with to travel. My boss was conferencing until Wednesday, the other head honcho left for a wedding on Thursday morning, and two other co-workers are on a retreat and a vacation. The one co-worker is just getting discharged from the hospital and will not return to work until next week. So, when it comes to elementary school, we have a short-handed staff to oversee the energy-filled children when they come this afternoon. This is where I ask, what am I going to do without this staff?
It reminds me of a quote from Mother Teresa that my mom has framed in her office. It reads "I know God won't give me anymore than I can handle; I just wish he didn't trust me so much!" Do we sometimes or often times think we cannot handle what God provides for us to do? This week I was definitely worried, but even Mother Teresa was worried in her day. God knows how he made us and knows what are particular bodies can handle. He also states in Matthew 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." With this kind of reassurance, it should be known to us that whatever we accomplish throughout the day is what God gave us the energy for and knew we would be capable of handling . This week, there were plenty of times where I didn't know what I was capable of doing, knowing I had less of a co-worker resource on my hands, but I challenged myself to go to bed every night, satisfied with what had been done throughout the day. I encourage you all to do the same, in knowing that you were not intended to accomplish any more than that.

American Sign Language and Cramping Hands

Yesterday, I got to experience open house at one of the high schools in our area. This building was unlike any I had been in before, because its hallways were outdoors, and its buildings were labeled by number, which made finding classrooms pretty difficult. My main purpose however, was not to enjoy the scenery the school provided, but start a relationship with the two teachers my Deaf student (well call him Jay) has throughout the school day.
When I first came to Miami, I knew one of my main missions while being here would be to invest a great deal of time in a youth named Jay, who moved from El Salvador in his early teens. He is now 16 and is in his  3rd year of schooling. He is also Deaf. Needless to say, my job was not going to be easy; then again, when is our task for God every easy? This was going to be a true test of my patience and spiritual gifts.
I met Jay in my first week of training and he completed disregarded me as a human being. I started to see how much ASL he knew, and that made him frustrated, to the point where he stopped looking at me and walked out of the room. This is when it got serious in my mind. My challenge was not simply to teach him or tutor him, I had to get him to trust me and my knowledge first! When gearing up for this mission well before I even arrived in Miami, this was a major aspect I overlooked.
Since this first encounter, I have eased my way into his life. He now looks at me when I sign to him and acknowledges the sign he knows, but has illustrated a signing level of a kindergartner or first grader, so my mission is much deeper than I thought.
Meeting his teachers was the final preparatory step that I needed to complete before administering work or tutoring sessions to Jay. Both of Jay's teachers are Deaf and have an interpreter in the classroom just in case. When I entered the classroom last night, and was the only representative for any student in the Deaf Education program present, I almost cried. How could parents not care? How could these kids not get attention at home? That's when it hit me. I am Jay's attention provider and can make even more of an influence on him if my relationship with his teachers and with him grows even stronger outside of the workplace. I spent the next hour signing and not verbalizing anything, except when I forgot a word and had to ask the interpreter what it was. My gift of ASL knowledge was used more than I have used it in quite some time, and led to the teachers asking me to come into Jay's classroom in the mornings, so I can be encouraging to him throughout the whole day. How many times have we needed that attention in our lives? How many times have you said, I just need a constant, or someone who I can turn to for help anytime? We have it. It's Christ. As servants of Christ, we are made to be like Christ, and strive to do as He would in any situation we encounter. As I go about my time here and continue to be in Jay's classroom and his after-school time, I am going to be a constant. He needs it, just like we need Christ. I will make it my mission to be that earthly reminder to him, and hope that he learns to identify with that aspect of me.
After this hour long signing conversation, my hands started to cramp up, and it threw me off because that had not happened in quite some time. But, those cramped hands were a reminder that the work I do as a missionary may not be easy, and it may cause some discomfort or pain, but the end result will be within God's will for me, so it is all worth it in the end.

Where and How You Serve

Serving others has been restructured in my head since being in Miami. Before coming down, many individuals were "impressed" by my intentional desire to serve, but why did it take a move 2,000 miles away for that mindset to be established? Why did they not see me as someone who was intentionally serving where I was? 
To serve others is to be intentional no matter where you are, by illustrating God's love in other's lives through the work, words and actions you provide so those individuals want to live, illustrating God's love, the same way. 
Two pieces of scripture come to mind when I think about this concept. First is
1 Peter 4:10-11 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen


How does this speak to you in the way that you serve those around you? For me, I have seen God work in ways I could never relate to earthly matters, but his illustration of gifts has been phenomenal. This week, I get the ability to start working with a student who is Deaf and associate with his teachers so I can start to teach him American Sign Language with the skills I have. Not only will this help him in school, but it will provide a way for him to thoroughly communicate for the first time. Through the gift of ASL knowledge and my strong desire to glorify God, I am able to serve. This summer I also ran a bible study where I found that my style of study was one that touched the lives of several individuals who reside in New York. I have and will be consistently writing them letters, using the words God gave me, so I can serve them. What talents/gifts can you use to serve? Acknowledging that you have those gifts and are confident in using the abilities you possess, God can take you anywhere He needs you to be. By limited our minds and limiting the chances we take in serving Christ, the more we limit the possibilities Christ has in place for us, and ultimately we can be blinded from the plan He has intended for us to follow. 


Second is Philippians 2:1-11  Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.  Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross! In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name,  that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth,  and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

As Christians, we are called to serve. God has given us direction on how he sees our lives to be and wants us to follow those ways. By humbling oneself and responding to God's callings, we will do nothing but serve and glorify Him. So the question is, how do you make it known that you are serving God? The answer is directly related to the use of your words, actions and prayerful mindset to do everything in your power to illustrate that servant within you, because any of those aspects of your life could plant the seed of Christ in someone else. Make every step you take be a walk with Christ and don't just enjoy the scenery.

Patience and Prayer

This week was the first week of school, and the children illustrated a mix of feelings before Monday approached.  Some were excited, some were nervous, but others would dread it because it meant they had to keep learning how to read, improve their math skills, or start writing those long essays on information that seems useless for the future. I however, remembered that this time of year was always one of anxiousness, because I could not wait to get back to school. I was eager to learn, and with that thought process in hand, I have decided to make that a goal for this year, meaning, I want the kids I work with the be excited about academia.
What does this all mean? It means having patience and praying for the children as individuals and not just a collective group. I have never been an extremely patient person, but this ministry has redefined that for me. This past Friday, I was assigned to work with one Kindergarten girl and a first grade boy during the tutoring hour immediately after the children arrive. The kindergarten girl was more reserved and I had talked with her outside of tutoring many times before. The first grade boy was slightly different, as he was the one child in my first grade group that caused "issues" to say the least. When he threw tantrums, it would including kicking the tables in the classroom or throwing toys, but when he calms down and focuses on his work, he could be called the most brilliant child in my classroom. This intelligence is something that I will not lose sight of, despite my frustrations with him and when I noticed this behavior earlier in the week, all I could think to do was pray. I prayed for him, I prayed for guidance working with him, and I prayed for the ability to understand and love him through being patient and optimistic. This session with him and the kindergarten girl was the first breakthrough of patience.
We sat around a table that was relatively high, and it had four benches around it. The kindergarten girl was on one bench, and the first grade boy and I were on the one perpendicular to her. Throughout the lesson, I did something slightly different and completely uncharacteristic for me as an instructor; I let the first grade boy go under the table and sit on different benches, and I let him walk around the room. This whole time, he answered all of my questions, was sounding out all of his sight words, and was continually moving through the whole process. I had patience and recognized his unique learning style in the process.
At the end of the day, before this first grade boy went home, he came up to me and tugged on my shirt. I looked directly into the big, dark eyes that were gazing at me and said "What's up, honey?" And he said "Thank you for being nice to me."
Prayer and Patience.

God is patient with us all the time. We have a plan mapped out for us, but we make wrong decisions and stray from that path. When we recognize that the ability to get back on that path through willingness to be patient and being completely responsive to prayer is necessary, then we ultimately recognize that this is one of the many times we best understand God's grace and His love for us. As I continue going about this ministry and serving because God has placed me here, love is going to be redefined. He has and will always love me, and that kind of intentional emotion needs to be more prevalent on this earth. As a missionary, it is important for me to not only love what I do, but to show love to each person I cross paths with, because the love that God intends for us to show is the only kind of love we need.

What Eyes Do We Use?

Since being in the Miami area, I have experienced some interesting culture shock, with everything from general housing appearances to the diversity among schools. However, the looks I have received while walking through Walmart, driving down the street, or standing on line at the grocery store have been the most unusual in relation to any other cultural experience I have had thus far. My question to them is what eyes are you using to see me?

These week, I have learned that the way you look at others should be the way that Jesus looks at them. The parable of the blind man in the book of John is one that illustrates this idea. Jesus healed the man who had been blind since birth by spitting in the mud and rubbing that mud onto his eyes. This kind of miracle makes me wonder, if I rub my eyes from how blind I have been to the beauty of each person I have encountered in life, how many more people would I have truly seen? Jesus sees us all and loves us all because he knows we are all blessings on this earth. As the school year started today, I was encouraged to remember that each child who walked into the building was beautiful in their own way and embracing that was my job. They all have different talents, family backgrounds, and interests, but they are all children of God, and that is more important than anything.

The Many Hats We Wear

Every Friday night, there is a theme to our middle school/high school worship night. Last night, everyone was told to wear a hat for a fun hat night. We played lots of games like capture the hat, a scaventure, and myself and one other new member had to wear plain white hats while all of the kids got markers and had to sign their names on as fast as they could in a serious competition; I won of course :)

The worship theme however, was discussing the many hats we wear, as well as the hat we should always wear, and that is the "child of God" hat. The kids discussed what it meant to wear a student hat, son/daughter hat, boyfriend/girlfriend hat, employee//volunteer hat, etc. The part that many of them did not realize was that the "child of God" hat never comes off. As believers in Christ and followers of the word, it is our job to illustrate that in all aspects of our lives. For example, in school you do not cut class or talk back to a teacher, as a child of God would not do those things. In your house, you should not curse at parents or slap around your siblings, but show them love at all times and talk about your frustrations in a calm verbal way. This discussion carried over to stations, where each of the employees had a category and a small activity for the children to complete. I had the boyfriend/girlfriend station and my mind was blown away. I explained the importance of 1 Corinthians 13:4-13, which is an entire section on love. I explained that you do not need to be in a relationship currently to know what love is because God shows it to you every day. At my station, there were heart shaped cut-outs and I told the kids that on  one side they should write the ways that God has shown His love to them, and on the other side, they should write down how they want to show that same kind of love in their relationships in the future. This could mean writing down your relationship values, ways to keep Christ as the center of that relationship or what you hope to find in the person you date. The kids wrote down everything from I will hug my boyfriend/girlfriend everyday to I can and will save myself for marriage. Every child participated.

At the end, we circled up for a final song and prayer. My boss asked if anyone was feeling led to pray and show they want to lead others. There was one child (who I will call "Kay") that responded saying he would. Kay is still in middle school and that young inspiration made me so excited. While we were cleaning up, I went over to him and told him that he did a great job with prayer that evening. His response left me speechless. 

Kay said, "Mary, isn't it sad that no one would pray when its to someone who died for us?"

What could you say to that? The only thing I could say to Kay was that I encouraged him to share that message with the other children, because they needed to hear it! Kay recognized the love God has for us and later discussed with me that he wants to work on wearing that "Child of God" hat all the time. Have you recognized that Christ died for us and we should pray to Him, thanking Him for that incredible love and sacrifice? How can you make your journey through life more Christ-like? Think of the hats you wear, and think of the changes you could make that would make your growth continue in more positive ways :)

This journey has been one week long, yet it has been one of the most amazing weeks I have ever experienced. 

Settled Outside Normal Comfort Zones

So I arrived in the Miami area on Friday afternoon with my incredible brother, Joe. His presence for the first few days was more than essential to my transition here, and he hopefully knows I appreciated it more than anything.
To focus on the current events, have you ever been somewhere that made you feel like the center of attention, just because you looked differently, dressed differently, or even appeared more uncomfortable than those around you? Yea....welcome to Miami. I was ready for this mentally and have been put into that set of emotions since I got off the Florida turnpike and drove on the streets of the city. For those of you in Rockland County and for those of you reading this on a couch or bed with the TV on and a nice laptop on your legs, I encourage you to think about how unbelievably privileged you are and do something to give back. We have come from an ideal suburban life that has provided a security bubble from many major real world issues that were mostly only discussed primarily in textbooks and classroom settings. I am in a city where many kids do not graduate from high school and never step foot on a college campus. Think of the stability you have had and think of the comforts you have been able to maintain because of that continuous support system of family and friends and that amazing life that you have complained about numerous times. I have been guilty of all of this, and I am not here to say I am perfect. However, this exposure to a lifestyle unlike ours and one that can test what my true necessities are is something I wish everyone could experience to some degree and learn to handle.
  I am a minority and have never been tested in my ability to live with that idea before now. I was told by many that this would be the case, and I discussed it in all of my interviews, but I am currently facing that foreseen reality.
Among these uncomfortable initial feelings, all I can still anticipate is having a year full of change, exposure, and God working in ways I would never expect. I may be getting looks now, but I can only hope as I learn to love this community and grow into it, I will become a part of the roots that this area is based through.
Unfortunately, most do not know that God will provide and protect in situations like this. He will never let go of you, no matter the hardships you face. My job down here is to provide help, inspire hope, and illustrate faith, and this is best done by coming to a level of understanding with love and compassion. I am not here to judge, but to be embedded. I am not here to push, but to emphasize and encourage. I am here for God and I will be His servant in whatever way He intends for me.

A Week Until Departure

With only one week until I spend over 24 hours travelling, I cannot be more excited to see what God has in store for the next year of my life. The entire beginnings of my decision to move to Miami simply started with the following scripture: 


Galatians 1:10- Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.


When deciding what my post graduation life would be, graduate school was the practical earthly decision that would have been easy to agree with; however, my heart was not focused on any particular master's degree or educational location. The only passion I knew of was my passion for Christ. With this in mind, I turned to him for my guidance, leaving all friends and family basically in the dark. No one knew I was considering anything other than graduate school, but when my prayers were answered, there was no holding back from telling others because I was confident in my choices. 
Here we are, one week before I leave, and I still feel as passionate as I did about this move when it was first laid on my heart. My mission ahead of me is one that will be full of challenges, but will test my abilities and talents while being an extremely intentional servant to Christ. 
Please pray that all goes well with the move, training, and the start of what will be an amazing year!